What school would be like if we were in charge

We always dream of the perfect world. What would it be like? Everything would be going smoothly, everything would be enjoyable, everything would be to our preference.
I was doing some thinking, and this would what school would be like if we were in charge.

1 - No lessons before 10AM and if lessons ended after 6PM, you get a free shuttle service home.

Come on, having 8 AM lessons are ridiculous. It doesn't matter if you've spent 12 years of your education waking up at 6AM and reaching school by 7 to sing mari kita, university is supposed to be a privileged time when you get to sleep late and wake up late all the time.

And lessons past 6PM? That's just inhumane. But perhaps sometimes there is a lack of LTs, etcetc, so we do indeed have to have lessons at that time. Going home is a real chore then! Late at night, all alone. What could make it better? An EXPRESS service to take you home!
This could be a special bus or a car pool service. But we will find a way. After all, NUSSU has lots of funds don't they?
(2 separate links here)


2 - Single race

Alright, enough complains about ATs and other foreign students stealing your grades, performing PDA at The Deck, the Red Room, the toilets, the corridors, and wherever else that is feasible.
Singapore is a multiracial country and we cannot afford to have racial disharmony of any sorts.

Our Engineering counterparts have been working on it for a long time, and after all their previous accolades such as the invisible cloak, we are pleased to announce the latest invention -

THE RACE POLARIZER GLASSES

Yes I know, it looks like 3D glasses. But it's not!

What this does is when you put it on, everyone will look the same race to you. How can there be any discrimination if you can't distinguish between any of the races?

Of course, an obvious limitation is that you will realize the differences when 'the others' begin opening their mouths. To which we have another solution:

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Earplugs yo.

3 - Dealing with the National University of Stairs/Slopes

Is this what it feels like in school?

We realized how many people feel the pain of climbing the stairs in NUS as well when our tweet 'NUS - National University of Stairs' was retweeted numerous times.

Don't worry! If we are in charge, we will begin immediate reconstruction of the school. First thing we will add is:

ESCALATORS EVERYWHERE.

Yes, no more climbing up 5 flights of stairs to reach The Deck from KR Terminal. No more climbing up the giant staircase when going to Business from Heng Mui Keng Terrace. Staircases all become escalators, so you don't have to be a perspiring mess when you finally reach your classroom.

To make things more interesting, we will include banisters at the side too, so for those in a rush (as people seem to always be) , they can take the 'express lane' - just slide down!

Artist impression

4. Campus Buses

Tired of waiting forever for your bus that never comes? When we take over, we will employ new schoolbuses so that everyone will never have to wait long!

Magic School Buses!

Basically they appear every 1 minute so there's no need to wait. No more being late for exams/lectures! Also, it deals with the overcrowded-buses problem!


5. The problem of a CAP.
University should be a place of holistic, purposeful education. Most of us have spent 12-13 years of our lives learning things that are useless and boring to us - such as pi is 3.1415192654, how to find dy/dx, 2-4 dinitrophenylhydrazine leaves an orange precipitate, and how to hide a handphone under a classroom desk. (Ok fine, the last one may not be useless or boring)

When we pay $6000< for EACH year of education, surely we want to pursue things that interest us, things that will engage us and things that we will ultimately find useful for ourselves in the future! BUT, with the fear of getting a low CAP, many of us have to plan strategically to get as decent a CAP as possible
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A decent CAP.
And a cute baby because everyone loves cute babies

There are so many exciting activities in school we wish we could pursue too, such as hall activities, school events, and more. However, we take part in all these at the risk of sacrificing our CAPs.

BOO HOO MY CAP IS DROPPING

Most of all, with only 3 S/Us, we cannot take modules that REALLY interest us, such as these two:

Click to enlarge

Therefore, we propose a new system - The total REMOVAL of CAPs. You will still get grades every semester for your modules, but they won't be contributing to this 'CAP' of yours.

How then, do we gauge how well you are doing in school? Who gets the first-class honors? The second upper?

It's simple - You will be assessed based on how many hours you spend in the library each day you're in school.

More library bonding time!
This aren't black faced monsters, we had to censor their faces out because we have no idea who they are. 

Note that it is hours per day in school, so it is fair to those who have 3 day weeks. 

E.g. Two students spend 10 hours in the library each, one has a 3 day week while one has a 5 day week. The one with the 3 day week has a higher LHPDIS (Library Hours Per Day In School) of 3.33 while his friend only has a LHPDIS of 2.

Of course, how you are measured is based on when you tap your matric card at the gantry. When you walk out, the sensor automatically detects your matric card so it scans you out. 

Being the great faculty with tremendous foresight, we understand this will lead to students spending ALOT of time in the library. Therefore, we will be implementing new sleeping corners at various corners of the library for your snoozing pleasure!

one such example

You will also get bonus points for each library book you borrow, and even more if the book is above 2kg!

So that's it for our first installment of suggested changes to school! What do you think?